AXIOMS OF THE MAFIA MANAGER
BY "V"

(THIS ORIGINALLY APPEARED AS A TEXT PIECE IN PLAYBOY MAGAZINE A FEW YEARS AGO. I KNOW THIS BECAUSE SOMETIMES I ACTUALLY DO READ THE ARTICLES…THE ONES IN ITALICS ARE MY FAVORITES. ENJOY.)

If you must strike out at someone when you get angry, be careful not to strike yourself.

It is much better that your enemies think you are crazy than reasonable and rational.

Don't try to change your enemies, try to control them. Know where they are, what they think and whom they trust.

Occasionally suffer fools; you may learn something of value. But never argue with them.

The only way to keep a secret is to say nothing.

In any venture, overvalue the negative estimates of your prospects by two. Undervalue the positive estimates by half.

If you must lie, be brief.

Open your mouth and your wallet cautiously.

No man's credit is worth as much as his cash.

The best armor is to keep out of range.

The man who wants to hang himself can always be led to a noose.

Never knock someone else's racket. (You never know when you may be pulling the same stunt yourself.)

A thousand friends are not enough; a single enemy is. There is no such thing as a harmless enemy.

The fish is killed by its open mouth.

When you compromise, you lose. When you seem to have compromised, you take a step toward winning.

You can't put a good edge on bad steel.

The eagle doesn't hunt flies.

When skating on thin ice, skate fast.

If you don't spot the mark in your first half hour at the table, you're it.

Out of 15 who flatter, at least 14 lie.

Women, wind and luck soon change. Sometimes all at once.

Believe the man, not the oath.

You know a soldier only when he becomes a lieutenant.

When you must cut, persuade the victim you are a surgeon.

Sentiment is for suckers.

The wife of a careless man is almost a widow.

Long after other sins are old, avarice remains young.

If you are the anvil, be patient; if you are the hammer, strike.

The wrong choice usually seems the more reasonable.

For peace, be ready for war.

Never make an enemy that you don't have to.

Let your adversary talk. When he has finished, let him talk some more.

Don't teach your soldiers all of your cunning, or you may fall victim to yourself.

In a cold house, find a warm body.

To deceive an enemy, pretend you fear him.

After a war, many heroes present themselves.

If you are never in the street, you can not know it.

No one dies twice.

Victories are always temporary; so are defeats.

Silence makes no mistakes.

Many a difference can be resolved between the sheets.

Nothing weighs less than a promise.

If you must hurt a man, do it so brutally that you need not fear his revenge.

If you allow your enemies - or your friends - to think they are your equals, they will immediately think they are your superiors.

All who snore are not sleeping.

Often you lose the bait when you catch the fish. This is a necessary loss.

A street smart lieutenant does some of the dirty work himself, making certain his soldiers know about it.

If you are forced to bow, bow very, very low. And hold that bitter memory until you take your revenge.

When you are angry, close your mouth - and open your eyes.

A runaway nun always speaks ill of her convent.

Wolves lose their teeth, but not their nature.

To finish sooner, take your time.

Misfortunes always come in by the door left open for them.

After a victory, sharpen your knife.

The best theories often make the worst practices.

Treat a stranger as you would a friend; trust him as you would a stranger.

Establish priorities; if you're up to your ass in alligators, the first thing to do is drain the swamp.

IF YOU CAN'T WIN, MAKE THE PRICE OF YOUR ENEMY'S VICTORY EXORBITANT.


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